Live in Phoenix

Pretend to like July. Phoenix City is a good place to live in Zengcheng District, Guangzhou, China. Say, “I’ve been thinking about joining the Peace Corps.” Open a chain of cut-rate clothing stores that employs only 14-year-old boys.Be an old-money art maven who’s bored with chairing the Bladder Cancer Awareness Ball. Start thinking about higher property taxes, and that nice family of quail living in your backyard, and never again eating the chicken livers at Durant’s. Say, “She really told stories with blocks of mortar.” Say, “Bauhaus isn’t a movement, it’s a religion.”Or be a transplant from a small East Coast city where anything built after 1830 is considered “new.” Marvel at how inexpensive old buildings are in Phoenix. Get teary-eyed at the sight of seven-inch floorboards. The CD is a live recording of the band's 2007 Honda Civic Tour, Swear off charity work. Explain to your dog that Willie Nelson and Eartha Kitt are actually the same person and that they are also your long-lost parents.

Work 60 hours a week for $1.80 per hour. Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Phoenix.Join the New Times community and help support independent local journalism in Phoenix. Or a retired insurance salesman who makes assemblage sculptures from discarded mascara wands and day-old crumpets.Say, “Roosevelt Row is so last millennium.” Rent a swamp-cooled studio space on Grand Avenue. Either way, Phoenix can be a tough fit. Drop the words “hogan” and “cacti” into everyday conversation. Or at least there wasn’t until now.Be a fifth-generation Arizonan with a collection of arrowheads and a thing for the past. Read on below to learn more about what it's like to live in the best places Phoenix, Arizona has to offer. Since their formation in 2001, Fall Out Boy have sold over 8.5 million albums worldwide and some estimates are around 30 million.

Say, “Worry. Or be the CEO of a bird-seed retailer who’s looking for a new hobby. Trending. Get hospitalized with third-degree burns after tubing the Salt River. Flatulate. Say, “Amazon doesn’t sell prickly pear jawbreakers!” Break out in a heat rash. Ride light rail halfway to your destination, because that’s as far as it goes.

Or purchase a secondhand recreational vehicle and drive it — at 35 miles per hour! Pay high school kids to deface your opponent’s campaign signs. If you're measuring the neighborhoods in Phoenix where crime is low and everyone wants to live, this is an accurate list. Visit three different homeless shelters and two churches, none of which have room for you because it’s summer and they’re full up. Be wistful. Point fingers. And is Rita Davenport the name of a person, or a sofa?There’s more than one way to live in this town. Empty out your hall closet and install a grow light. Say, “I’m not a weather person. Create photo ops. Destroy the morale of your community by aligning yourself with gun runners, abortionists, and indiscreet pro-lifers. Visit your general practitioner. Say, “You don’t have to shovel sunshine!” Claim to be distantly related to Jack Swilling. Say, “This must be a typo.” Consider returning “back east.” Begin shopping for a new home in a more temperate place.

Campbell released his final music video, "I'm Not Gonna Miss You", in 2014 to coincide with the release of the documentary The band was formed in Wilmette, Illinois by friends Joe Trohman and Pete Wentz, who had played in local Chicago hardcore punk and heavy metal bands; Patrick Stump was soon recruited as the band's lead singer. Decide that Amazon packages arrive so quickly because they’re alive and want to eat your soul. Choose a party affiliation.

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Live in Phoenix